an open letter to teachers of my dyslexic child

A friend of mine wrote this letter ... at the time she wished to remain anonymous.  One day, she may not, but until then, I wanted it to be shared with the world in some way.  

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Imagine you are in a classroom and I’m the teacher. I love to quilt, it’s one of my many passions. Now I lay out some tools, and a pattern for you and tell you that you have one hour to complete a quilt top for me.  I know for a fact that this is possible because I’ve done this. I show you all how it’s done, and set you free to start. 

Now my guess is that you might find this slightly overwhelming, and imagine your job at the school was rated on how well you did on this quilt. Now my guess is that you’d be slightly anxious and confused on how best to use each of the tools at your disposal. I would imagine that your brain would work pretty hard threading the machine cutting the fabrics to the exact dimensions and that at the end of that hour you maybe would be super glad it’s over. 

Now imagine that all the people around put down there projects all completed and because you didn’t finish you are told that you can’t leave… even though you gave 100 percent of your attention and focus it wasn’t good enough and you don’t deserve the break everyone else does. Now would you see that experience as “oh they are trying to help me”, or would you see that as a punishment for the fact that you can’t work as fast as those around you? I’d imagine you’d feel pretty bad about that and upset, and frustrated and desperately in need of a break after trying hard and doing your best. 

I feel like this scenario explains so much of what my dyslexic son's day is currently like. 

Now imagine that quilting scenario again, and imagine that I’m aware you may struggle to get that quilt done in an hour, so I come with your fabric pieces pre-cut for you.  I have already filled your bobbin and added thread to your machine. I have left a visual with directions on the steps to use to complete one square so that as you sew all 12 you can look back at it when ever needed to reassure yourself that you’ve done it correctly. And then to take away the stress of having a perfect seam, I add a magnet beside the needle that will guide your fabric through so that all your seams are exactly 1/4 inch.

These accommodations wouldn’t remove the fact that the whole project is waiting for you, but perhaps may give you the opportunity to be able to accomplish the goal with less anxiety and perhaps finish along with the others in the class.  The finished worked would still be your accomplishment and maybe you wouldn’t dread the next time quite so much.

- S. Daniels,
parent dyslexia advocate

Having accommodations for dyslexia should be no different than allowing glasses for someone with a visual impairment or a wheelchair ramp for someone who requires it, yet as parents of children with learning disabilities, we don't experience this ease.  We are constantly researching new techniques that help our children learn using their strengths, yet continually trying to convince you to allow them.  We know that you are taught about individual differences but yet we are up against your desire to assess all kids "fairly" and equally.  If success is TRULY the goal of education, then we need to do things better.  We need to teach to their strengths, allow accommodations whenever possible and assess our children not based on how well they can perform on your tests, but how much they KNOW.   We need to help our children to make the quilt ... in whatever way they need.